Some Examples

• Dodgers kept it chill, toppled the Padres 6-3 while Will Smith put in work with 2 hits and a run. The stands? Deader than a Monday matinee, but hey, the seagulls turned out and the die-hards came for hot dogs. Only thing hotter was Max Muncy’s bat.#

• A’s sneak past Houston 3-1—Rooker hustles for a run, Butler wears a golden sombrero with 2 Ks, Muncy chips in. Bleachers empty, sunburns strong, crowd snacking like it’s feeding time at the zoo. Energy? More like nap time—unless that hot dog lands your way.#

• Boston blanks Seattle 2-zip. J.P. Crawford and Arozarena each whiffed twice—bats colder than Duke’s feet up in the booth. Crowd so thin you’d swear it was secret handshake night, but they made more noise than the bats did!#

• Angels squeak past the Yanks 1-zip on a night so cold even the bats were shivering. Wells and Rice both whiff twice, Stanton’s frozen at the dish, and up in 117 the Wild Thing wannabes outnumber hits. Grandma Esther’s still slugging dogs—legend. Cleveland wild as ever!#

• Rays torch the O’s 7-1, with Brandon Lowe rippin’ two hits and tastin’ home. Stands poppin’—nacho cheese in the air and thundersticks smackin’ louder than my aunt’s stories. Old caps, new faces, mustard stains, and summer ball in full swing.#