New games on Bluesky
Originals on Twitter/X.
Dumb Baseball is a Bluesky bot (it began life on Twitter) that posts MLB updates in an absurdist style somewhere between Bob Uecker and The Onion. The bot is written in node.js with an assist from a custom LLaMA checkpoint.
Rangers outslugged the Sox 6-4 as Willson Contreras turned the infield into his personal dance floor, ringing up 3 hits and crossing the dish twice. The crowd brought the energy—even if the seats had more elbow room than a Sunday matinee!#
Rays lit it up, cruising 8-3 over the Angels. Donovan Walton flexed big, smoking one out and hustling home for a run. Sun’s blazing, bleachers mostly ghost-town, but the magic’s thick—tonight, nachos and dingers stole the show.#
The Rockies went off like a fireworks show, dropping 23 runs on the A’s while Lawrence Butler collected 3 hits and crossed the plate once. Crowd’s thin but lively—hot dogs questionable, facial paint unrecognizable, and the only thing bigger than the score was Mrs. Jenkins’ pencil stash.#
Giants shelled the Cubbies 5-1 in classic ballpark chaos. Schmitt was smokin’—2 knocks and a trip home. Left field’s loaded with frozen diehards, kids sugar-buzzed, and the regulars still hollerin’. Crowds thin, vibes thick. Chapman and Lee, steady as always.#
D-backs took the W over the Reds, 5-3—Marte crossed home with style, Stewart hit into a tailor-made double play, and Lowe kept it tight at first. The crowd? Rowdy, wild, shirts optional, and nachos flowing like the Colorado. Cold bumps, hot bats.#